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Tag archive for ‘Marriage’

Are you BeingMaryJane this Valentine’s? (Message for the Ladies)

Everyone knows about the sexy and love-wrecking show “Being Mary Jane” that airs on BET on Tuesdays at 10pm. So people may say this isn’t the Gabrielle Union that we have seen on movies! True, but this diva who wants love in a whole another way can be love-wrecking….only when it deals with a married man!  She has her ways with the sexy lingerie, long flowing hair, chocolate body skin tone and the ass that makes guys say “WOWWWW” So what married man wouldn’t wanna tap that? LOL


But in reality, messing with a married man ladies can be pretty dangerous.  Only if you are playing your cards right and don’t get caught, but this brave Mary Jane confesses to his wife in the pet store that she was having sex with her husband on the movie last year when it was first aired.  Wow! How many women would actually be brave enough to do that?  Ladies, I know sometimes we get caught up with the scent of a man and the way he looks, the car he drives and how good he is with foreplay, but if he’s married, then its showing red stoplights everywhere.  In this case, Mary Jane didn’t find out he was married right away until after they made love and his wedding ring just happened to fall out of his jean pocket and she stepped on it! When that happens, you have two choices, to either continue seeing him or stop seeing him.

You never know what type of wife she is until you see her up in person.  Although Mary Jane can be slick in getting what she wants, he is still in between two women who both loves him dearly.  One thing you don’t want to do ladies is to break up a marriage between a man and his wife….especially if he has kids.  Even though this is a reality show, it teaches us about how much we can be blinded by love without even considering the real consequences behind our temptations!  On Valentine’s ladies, enjoy yourself and make the most of it! If you are single, please be smart about it.  There are plenty things to do on Valentine’s Day as singles; hang out with other singles at an event or if you have other single friends, go hang out with them.  But never be so desperate to give a temporary man a fling and your goodies for one night when you are only going to regret the decision later on in life.  Be smart about your decision and have fun.

As far as Mary Jane, the show is a great show that teaches us a lot!  Just Being MaryJane!


Peace and Blessings!


Lil Woman on A Mission

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Categorized as Blog Topics, Dating & Relationships, Blog Topics, What Do You Think, Blog Topics, What You May Not Know

If you are in a relationship is it ok to have friends of the opposite Sex?

Lovers & Friends by LIL JON, USHER, LUDACRIS

    So to me this is a no brainer if you are currently in a relationship or you plan on getting seriously involved with someone, and your partner has a problem with you having or being friends with the opposite sex it is very obvious you are committing to the wrong person or that someone just simply is not for you. When we are younger and began to date it is only natural to feel that instant jealous, insecure and being overly territorial of are crush or boyfriend/ Girlfriend talking to the opposite sex only because we feel as though there could be possible competition or the possibility of are crush liking someone else. In other words when you are young you are unable to see the bigger picture of life and looking beyond what the eye see’s.  I know that I have defiantly been guilty of this act numerous of times I used to feel like “I am all my man needs so why does he need the companionship of other women”. I did not realize or even care at the moment that these women he called friends had been in his life years before I had even met him and they had been the ones holding him down long before I came along. At the time I just knew that I was extremely jealous that the man I was dating had multiple female friends even though they were never romantically involved, and they were just friends he grew up with  I couldn’t help but get the images in my mind of them doing something else ,or boo loving on the phone when I wasn’t around, The games our minds play on us, I know I was going crazy just thinking of the what ifs, and should of, could of, and would of’s.I know that in a relationship trust is a very important factor, and you should be able to trust your spouse when they are out of your site. Freindships are one of the most powerful influences in our lifes and to some extent they can shape and mold your character because of the influence they have on you. Some would say that having friends of the opposite sex is a disater waiting to happen, but I say it depends on your partner and the type of relationship the two of you share. All I can say is communication is key and if you dont trust your partner you shouldnt be with them.


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Categorized as Blog Topics, What Do You Think

Single and Ready to Mingle: How not to marry a Jerk? P.1

Oh yes I am back and I have something to say. I have missed you my blog. Vacation took a lot out of me; I needed a vacation from my vacation. I am still single and ready to mingle. I have noticed so many of used to be single friends are getting married. Some for all the right reasons, while others are all wrong. Who am I to say anything if they are happy. But what do you say when your friend is marrying a JERK!!!!!!!!


Single and Ready to Mingle: How not to marry a Jerk/Jerkette?

What is a jerk? A jerk is selfish, manipulative man or woman who has
control issues. They often treat you as if you are nothing. Also when
it comes to others they have a lack of respect for their thoughts and
opinions. What they may say is perceived as their law. Do you know
someone like this? If so you probably chose to overlook it and see
pass the imperfection and/or tried to change it. Not many jerks can be
I sat in on a workshop discussing just this. Why did I take this
workshop? I am a single and never been married woman. I want to know
exactly what I am getting into before I actually do. You can actually
learn from others life experiences even going through your own life,
so that you also do not make the same bad decisions. The other women
and men in this workshop come from being married multiple times to
currently separated from their current spouse. The ages ranged from
29-55 for both men and women. Imagine being in your 50’s and just now
learning that you have married three jerks or jerkette. This is
something that people should have already learned at some point. So, I
am going outline this in a two part series.
When you are dating someone you are simply dating their
representative. The real person usually shows up years into the
marriage. This is what we don’t want to happen. Here is five ways to
know that you really know someone. The acronym is F.A.C.E.S.
F- Is for FAMILY: How much do you know about this person’s family.
Have you ever sat down and watched how they interact with their family
members? Do they have a family foundation that you want to be a part
of? Are their family values the same as yours?
A-is for ATTITUDE:  Are they responsible for their actions? When you
are having a conversation are they easily offended? Does this person
always have funkiness about them when they get around other people.
This person may not be a good people person and these tis into to
having good  relationship skills.
C-is for COMPATIBILTY : How much do you all have in common? Not just
in the bedroom but personality wise. Not saying you have all the same
interest but have some. I know people say that opposites attract but
opposites still have something in common.
E-is for EXAMPLE. Ask questions. What are some examples of past
relationship? Why did you divorce the first time? If you all were
together for so long why didn’t you marry?
S- Is for SKILLS. What type of relationship skills does she/he have?
How has their friendships worked out, can they be your best friend as

Stay tuned for the next set out ways to determine if he or she is jerk…




E. Ahdai

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Categorized as Blog Topics, Dating & Relationships, Blog Topics, Single and Ready to Mingle

Interracial Couples On The Rise, But Not Marrying


Interracial couples are increasingly common in America, but many are opting not to get married.

That’s according to a new analysis of U.S. Census datapublished by the Los Angeles Times, which found racially and ethnically mixed couples were more than twice as common in 2012 as they were in 2000.

But there were also more than twice of the amount of unmarried interracial couples living together than married ones. In 2012, nine percent of unmarried couples living together came from different races, compared with about four percent of married couples, according to Census Bureau data.

“The same gap exists for Latinos — who are not counted as a race by the Census Bureau — living with or marrying people who aren’t Latino,” the newspaper added.

Some researchers say the reason for interracial couples not marrying is disapproving family members.

“You don’t need to get a blessing from either side of the family [to live together],” Zhenchao Qian, a sociology professor at Ohio State University, told the Times. “Moving to the next stage is sometimes more difficult.”

That’s because “many older Americans, especially whites, are still uneasy about interracial marriage.”

Or there were three ago. According to a 2009 study by the Pew Research Center, just half of white respondents aged 50 to 64 said they would be fine with one of their relatives marrying someone of any other race or ethnicity.

Another reason for the parental uneasiness cited by researchers: fear of a loss of culture.

“That seemed to be the more common concern,” Damon Brown, an African American man married to an Indian American woman, told the paper. Their families thought “you can be black, or you can be Hindi,” he said.

Whatever the case, it’s clear some Americans still are uncomfortable with seeing racially mixed couples.

Earlier this year, a Cheerios commercial featuring an interracial family drew so many prejudiced comments online, General Mills decided to disable commenting on its YouTube account.

It’s sad that in this day and age people are still letting others dictate who they love and marry.  Marriage equality is on the rise, and that’s one of the most taboo relationship topics ever. Gay and lesbian couples have been fighting for their rights for years, and now that they have them, they are proud to get married, but interracial couples, who have had rights for far longer, are still scared to marry.

Whatever happened to keeping your culture and teaching your children about how wonderfully blended they are?  Make your choices based on your own perceptions, not on what others have to say.


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Categorized as Blog Topics, Dating & Relationships, Blog Topics, Homelife and Family, Blog Topics, What Do You Think

Single and Ready to Mingle: Salute to LOVE!!!!!

I will say this I love LOVE and this blog is about love today.

Love is such an awesome feeling ; especially when it is genuine. I am guilty of sitting and listening to my favorite group of love songs; they send me to  a place. That place where love lives and lives healthy. Being single doesn’t mean that you don’t know what love feels like. You have to love yourself first. (repeat) . Loving yourself allows you to know how to love a person when they finally come into your life.  I have my head phones on as I always do when I am writing. The song “ME” by Tamia comes on. In that song it talk about choosing yourself over the relationship. Call it selfish (so what)  When people leave relationships they sometimes seem to become bitter and say falling love is horrible. No one ever said it was so nice. Real love is going to be hard.

I have been in the middle of a love season for that past few months. I have been surrounded by so much love that I am a full. MY FRIENDS ARE GETTING MARRIED!!!!!!!! Some would get depressed. Me on the other hand I look at it as inspiration.  They help me understand their love. How their love is so unique and different? How their love is still out there. I never want to discount love. Love is such an awesome feeling when you find someone to love you back. So color me happy for my friends, I just hate that I will out of the country when they get married…

Being single is not always so hard. It is about be patient and the right person being created just for you.  SO to my other singles love is out there for us… If someone hasn’t told you that they love you lately. Then let me be the first I LOVE YOU!!!!!! You are an AWESOME human being… and LOVE IS YOU!!!!


Have a great weekend I will see you next week….


E. Ahdai


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Categorized as Blog Topics, Single and Ready to Mingle, Blog Topics, What Do You Think