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Post archive for ‘Single and Ready to Mingle’

Single and Ready to Mingle: I’m NOT Interested!

Hi My Singles!!!! Hope that your weekend was super awesome. Mine was ok, nothing to write home about. Today’s topic is about not interested in someone and they keep on trying. YIKES! I know I am not that only person who has been in that space. I know this because one of my girlfriends and I  were just talking to me about this over drinks the weekend.  There is a guy in her world right now who just doesn’t get it right now. IT has gone as so far as her telling him that they are on different pages. Still the calls, the advances, and the creepy text messages are still coming. I even told her to stop responding to the text messages and calls.  There are ways to tell a person you are not interested. I know you are saying the hints don’t work. With those you actually have to say you are not interested and you are not feeling them like that. Especially if you can’t see it going past friendship. You have to be honest with the person. I don’t suggest leading people on and making them think it is something else and it is clearly not.

You are probably saying you are single how dare you be picky? Ummmm I have a preference and me laying down with just any old person is not apart of it. Most people know from the gate if they are sexually attracted to someone. It takes a lot for myself to be interested in you sexually. I am going to have to have a conversation with you to see if the brain matches the outside.  Oh yes I have come across some “Cute Dummies”, “Mr. Don’t have ish” (This guy lives at  home with his mama and drives her car and has no plans of changing it), “Mr. Arrogant” and etc. So imagine that life?

Here is what my Facebook Friends had to say about it: How do you tell someone you are not interested in them sexually?

Robert James U don’t. You just don’t make that move. And lock em in the friend zone
Janae Marie Yea better not to make them think there is a chance
SaKoyra Bullock I’m going to go out on a limb and say “don’t have sex with them”. But I could be wrong here
Lb Isthename By not having sex with them… EVER… Avoid all sexual convo, jokes, innuendos, ignore any sexual advances or compliments and try your best not to ever be sexy around that mofo
Noahiamreal Jackson Stop talking to them
Lb Isthename ^that was what I missed
Sean Johnson I don’t wanna do you…..
Robert James Or i just say I love you like a sister yeah that’s a obvious sign nothings going down
So you see you can break it down easily.
Happy Dating XOXOXOXOX
E. Ahdai

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Categorized as Blog Topics, Dating & Relationships, Blog Topics, Single and Ready to Mingle, Blog Topics, What Do You Think

Single and Ready to Mingle: “The Introduction”

Hello my Singles! I think you all know where I am going with this blog. Who are you most likely to introduce to the guy/girl you are currently dating? Everyone is not going to be privileged enough to meet who are dating. For me you have to get my friends. My friends are wild and zany. On top of that they know how to read people very well. After you meet them you will move on to meeting my parents; my mother in particular . She has no problem sharing what she thinks with me.  Once you get pass those people you are home free.

I asked my Facebook friends the same question. Here are their answers

Shannon Nicole:  My best friend(s) and my mother… My best friends because they know my like a book.. My mother because she reads ppl very well, too well. Lol

Bella Tiffany:  My best friend… She know me. I’ve never introduced a man to my parents. Haven’t met one that special.

Author Shakeim Edmonds: My cousin “Mo”, because he analyze people just as much as I do.

My singles I am going to be super honest with you. Some of my family I wish not to introduce my “boyfriend” to. Oh I know you are thinking “Why not”. Here is why, they are so judgmental and I don’t have time nor energy for them. They always seem to see the bad in every situation and want to attack characters. How can you attack someones character when you don’t even know the person. Sometimes your mate is not the same with everyone else as he/she may be with you. You may get to see the real side of them while others only see how arrogant he/she may be. You get to see their heart and how genuine they can be. It is about the process of getting to know someone that they miss out on.  You know the reason why you fell in love with that person, no one else has to know. I know I am going to piss off some of my family members. Hey but you know why you only hear about the person I may be dating and never lay eyes on him.

What others think really shouldn’t matter if you are happy!

Happy Dating!!!!!


E. Ahdai

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Categorized as Blog Topics, Dating & Relationships, Blog Topics, Single and Ready to Mingle, Blog Topics, What Do You Think

Single and Ready to Mingle: Pretty Face Ugly Attitude…

Hey my singles!!!! I am coming off of a long week. Clearly I have been all over the place dealing with this crazy weather in the south . That is neither here or there. Today’s blog has to deal with the whole pretty face and ugly attitude. I was chatting with my friend Jay whom you all have heard me talk about before. HE and I were discussing women’s attitudes. He says to me “Now you know you are not included in  this because you don’t get upset about nothing and when you do you say it with a smile. You have to be the coolest chick I know.”  Well aww shucks… I am kind of cool. However not every woman is me and I am not them. Lately he has been coming across women with nasty ass attitudes. It is a no go for him. Could it be that that they are holding on to some old feelings from the last man? Or could it be that he hurt her so bad that she is now bitter? Or does she feel like the world owes her something.

LADIES! No man wants to deal with a nasty ass attitude all the time. I am going to be real honest as woman I don’t want to hear it either. Every day is not a jacked up day. No one pissed in your corn flakes. To wake up in the morning in a blessing why not enjoy it. Please reevaluate yourself. That attitude you are wearing is not cute and your pretty face is only going to get you so far. I have had females like this in my life. I am a real mild mannered person. I love to have a good time. I am a joker. Once you kill my vibe I am done for. I remember going out to club one night, her mouth almost got us in a fight; all because a chick was looking at her. Looking in someone’s direction doesn’t classify you acting like a plum monkey fool. The girl wasn’t  even looking at this nutcase. Then outside the club her boyfriend is trying to calm her and she bucks at him. Lets just say this after that is stopped rocking with her. NO one wants to deal with that, nor do that have time.

As I always I ask my Facebook followers the same question that I ask myself. “What causes some women to have nasty attitudes?”

Abdul: They are ignorant as hell thus making many aspects of life deplorable.

Bella Tiffany: Some women were raised that way. To always be in the defense- “I gotta hurt you before you hurt me.” 
Trust is huge! And holding on to the past hurts in their life. I do believe some people are just plain nasty but their are underlying issues that cause all that pain. 
*readers digest version of my lengthy thoughts

Ace:Sometimes its pasts hurts that haven’t been addressed or haven’t healed….

Kimberly: I would say that negative experiences make some bitter and angry. They put a defensive wall up and it’s hard to crack.

Seems as if people believe that because these women have been hurt they can act as if the worlds owes them something. I was once told that the world owes me nothing, but you off into the universe what you want to receive back. Yes I have be hurt before. You wouldn’t believe the stories I could tell you. That hurt created  the strong person that I am today. After the hurt I had to get back to myself.  These women are not just young; there are some old ones to. LET GO OF THE HURT. It takes more energy to be upset about nothing. Being happy takes less energy. The thing about happiness it is created with in you and no one can take it from you .


Have a great rest of your week!!!!!


E. Ahdai

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Categorized as Blog Topics, Dating & Relationships, Blog Topics, Single and Ready to Mingle, Blog Topics, What Do You Think

Single and Ready to Mingle: Not trying to be “Mary Jane”

Hello my Singles! I hope that you are having a super awesome day. This topic my rub someone the wrong way. ***Please do not be offended this is just a matter of opinion. *** So last night I was watching “Being Mary Jane” and wondered what are my other singles thinking about this show. Now Mary Jane is a successful single woman, but having issues finding the right man.

Every time I turn on this show I get a little more disturbed. Every week she is fighting herself over this married man. Stop.. Hold Up.. Flag on the play.. BIG RED FLAG. Heffa!  He is married what s it there to fight yourself about. Last weeks episode he proposed. I was like how in the hell do you really ask someone to marry you and you are still clearly sleeping with your wife. Oh you all didn’t see that at the end of last weeks episode.  (I DID). Then what gets me is all the affirmations and quotes she has on the sticky notes. Why is she not following them? They are some really good ones at that.  See  I believe this is why I only watched one episode of Scandal. (So not interested).

I want to date the right way. Meet a single man. Get to know single man. Date single man and see if it has potential to be more. No where in there does it say Meet a man. Find out that he is married. Keep dating married man. (ARE YOU SERIOUS). Me personally I am not fit to be the other woman. I am not fit to be confined to the four walls of my home or to be kept a secret.

Then I keep seeing status updates on Facebook like this : “Being Mary Jane….think most of us girls can relate!”

Ummm Excuse me I cannot relate to being in love with a married man. I can’t even relate to having sex with a married man. So how are other women relating to this. Is dating so bad these days that we have to stoop to a level of deceit to get what we want. I was always told “If he will cheat to be with you, he will cheat on you. You will lose him the same way you got him.”

I asked others their opinions of the show. Some have watched while others have not.

Dawn Blanchard-Deep Rivers: I personally have not watched it….the commercials were enough to spoil my thoughts….they had a commercial where she made the comment “Gay is the New Black”, and I ended up writing about it…after that nope can’t watch it….and tired of it being okay for a woman to cheat in a tv show and the audience or most love it….I also don’t watch Scandal because of this

Avtomat Kalashnikov: Haven’t seen the show but heard rave reviews.  Didn’t know what it was about but Dawn Blanchard-Deep Rivers synopsis killed it for me.  I, too, have no desire to watch Scandal.

Dwight Sloan:I love it. It’s entertaining and heck it shows something that although it may not be the greatest teaching of morals, it shows some reality.  And hell it’s funny to me.


Please keep in mind this is my opinion. If this is our favorite show enjoy it.


Happy Dating to all


E. Ahdai

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Categorized as Blog Topics, Dating & Relationships, Blog Topics, Single and Ready to Mingle, Blog Topics, What Do You Think

Single and Ready to Mingle: Chivalry is not DEAD!

�HI MY SINGLES!!!!!!! I hope that you all had a wonderful Monday. I didn’t have the day off like some but I had a good day. Tonight’s blog comes from a conversation I was having with a co-worker today.  The conversation went something like this.

Her: E, I am not sure how I am feeling right now?”

Me: Ok, why do you say that?

Her: I had a good time with “Mr. Man” this weekend, but he did a few things I am not use to?

Me: What do mean? What did he do? ( I am thinking something sexual went really wrong or really right) #dontjudgeme

Her: I am not use to men opening doors and taking my bags for me. I guess I need to stop being so self efficient.

Me: (side eye)What the hell are you use to? and that has nothing to do with being self efficient.

Her: Not that…It has been a long time since I have had someone do things like that.

Me: Clearly you have been dealing with the wrong type of men.

Again clearly she has been dealing with the wrong type of men if she is not use to someone opening the door for her. I am sorry for me that is required. I need a mans man but he also has to have those gentleman qualities.  Chivalry is defined as  the qualities idealized by knighthood, such as bravery, courtesy, honor, and gallantry toward women.  Does he open the door for me?(Yes) Does he grab my bags when I come out the door of the airport and carries them to the car? (Yes) If someone speaks to me in manner that I am not liking, does he stick up for me in the proper way? (Yes violence is never the answer but he protects my best interest). I can respect a man who treats me like a lady and not a child.

I feel like some women have traded the gentlemen in for this so called bad boy. You know the one who is so disrespectful. No one can raise a man if he is already grown. He just wasn’t  raised right.  That is like trying to teach an old dog new tricks. (WAY TOO MUCH WORK). Who wants to deal with rudeness  on a constant basis.

What I find funny is this. I posted a question on my Facebook page “ Ladies are some of us so  conditioned to the wrong man who does not have any gentleman qualities that we think that chivalry is dead?” Do you know not one woman answered it… HMMMMMMMMMM it makes me wonder what are women dealing with these days. Wait one minute, one of favorites Miss Perri had this to say:

“No. I think that some women are so thirsty, and on a sac chase, that they don’t require a man to show he has gentleman qualities. When you have little to no expectations, and too eager to please, but not to be pleased, you get what you get. ”

To some they may say that my standards are set high. UMMMM NO my standards are set at being treated like a woman, a lady, and a person. I think everyone deserves to be treated right…

Well that was my 2cent for the day… Join me on Wednesday… I have something for you…

Happy Dating


E. Ahdai

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Categorized as Blog Topics, Single and Ready to Mingle