Tag archive for ‘Friends’
Oh yes I am back and I have something to say. I have missed you my blog. Vacation took a lot out of me; I needed a vacation from my vacation. I am still single and ready to mingle. I have noticed so many of used to be single friends are getting married. Some for all the right reasons, while others are all wrong. Who am I to say anything if they are happy. But what do you say when your friend is marrying a JERK!!!!!!!!
Single and Ready to Mingle: How not to marry a Jerk/Jerkette?
What is a jerk? A jerk is selfish, manipulative man or woman who has
control issues. They often treat you as if you are nothing. Also when
it comes to others they have a lack of respect for their thoughts and
opinions. What they may say is perceived as their law. Do you know
someone like this? If so you probably chose to overlook it and see
pass the imperfection and/or tried to change it. Not many jerks can be
I sat in on a workshop discussing just this. Why did I take this
workshop? I am a single and never been married woman. I want to know
exactly what I am getting into before I actually do. You can actually
learn from others life experiences even going through your own life,
so that you also do not make the same bad decisions. The other women
and men in this workshop come from being married multiple times to
currently separated from their current spouse. The ages ranged from
29-55 for both men and women. Imagine being in your 50’s and just now
learning that you have married three jerks or jerkette. This is
something that people should have already learned at some point. So, I
am going outline this in a two part series.
When you are dating someone you are simply dating their
representative. The real person usually shows up years into the
marriage. This is what we don’t want to happen. Here is five ways to
know that you really know someone. The acronym is F.A.C.E.S.
F- Is for FAMILY: How much do you know about this person’s family.
Have you ever sat down and watched how they interact with their family
members? Do they have a family foundation that you want to be a part
of? Are their family values the same as yours?
A-is for ATTITUDE: Are they responsible for their actions? When you
are having a conversation are they easily offended? Does this person
always have funkiness about them when they get around other people.
This person may not be a good people person and these tis into to
having good relationship skills.
C-is for COMPATIBILTY : How much do you all have in common? Not just
in the bedroom but personality wise. Not saying you have all the same
interest but have some. I know people say that opposites attract but
opposites still have something in common.
E-is for EXAMPLE. Ask questions. What are some examples of past
relationship? Why did you divorce the first time? If you all were
together for so long why didn’t you marry?
S- Is for SKILLS. What type of relationship skills does she/he have?
How has their friendships worked out, can they be your best friend as
Stay tuned for the next set out ways to determine if he or she is jerk…
This week I decided that I would dedicate all of my post to the MEN FOLK. Yes, the men folk. I am allowing them to ask me questions that they have been dying to know the answers from a woman. Now Ladies I am not giving away our secrets just giving them a little insight on how we think. The questions come from my inbox via my Facebook pagehttps://www.facebook.com/emiaj.ahdai
QUESTION:Should there ever be a limit on how many female friends a man should have in his life?
ANSWER: I don’t think there is a limit to the number of female friends a man can have in his life. Insecure women have that worry. Yeah those, you know the ones who think you are sleeping with the pretty best friend girl. Unknown to her the female best friend has someone and you it is not you. I get so sick of them. Yes I did say it let me repeat. I GET SICK OF INSECURE WOMEN! I say that because I have 4 males friends who are exactly that. MY FRIENDS! They are apart of my life to keep sane and grounded and not killing other men (LOL) Then women that fit that role of just friends and keep it real are so rare.If a man has a few of them then he is well rounded man. He has seen them go through hell and back. He is learning. What I mean by he is learning is that he is learning not what to do when it comes to women. Those women are helping shape and create a good man. They tell him when he is dead ass wrong and when he is right. So if you have 5 great female friends hey then have them… Ask that woman how many male friends she has? See if that is a conversation she is willing to have. If she says she doesn’t have any, I will find it hard to believe. I suggest every one a “just friends” of the opposite sex.
Thank you for your question!
DO you listen your friends who are in relationships? I mean really listen to what the say about relationships. I love my friends. We are a small group and all very different people but the one thing that remains the same is that; WE LOVE EACH OTHER. Out of all of my friends there are 3 of us who are SINGLE. So sitting around listening to the ones who are in relationships can be a good or bad thing. Our married friends will tell you “hey we have problems but we work them out and go on.” While the others who are just girlfriends are so quick to throw in the towel or complain. They never tell you about the good times of being the girlfriend. Don’t we as singles have to the be the girlfriend first then hope to be the wife. Then they want to give you advice about how to get a man. PAUSE…. I don’t want the type of relationship you have because it seems a little stressful and the way my life works I don’t do stress. PLAY
Dating should be fun right, and I guess we are so caught up in the newness of it all you ignore the flaws. Then they really get to know the person and not really like them. I will be the first to say I am flawed and I know my flaws and if you don’t like them SO WHAT. No one is perfect and their is no such thing as a perfect relationship. The ones who complain make us not want to the whole relationship thing. But if they were single I bet you they would complain about that too.
NOW it always ever so funny when they say “Hey I am going to hook you up with someone.” or “I know the perfect guy for you.” Then you meet this “person” and they are a complete mess. 1) I am slightly picky and like my preference. 2)He has to be able to have conversation.. It is not always about sex, cars and politics LOL.. and I am not so desperate that I need my friends to hook me up. I am capable of finding my own. Maybe I just want that head over heels feeling because of him…..
TO BE CONTINUED….
Maybe a month ago, I was on the phone with our Managing Editor, Emiaj Ahdai and she was telling me about her first novel. She’s been working on it for a while and her story raises a question, “Can a man and woman ever be just friends ” I say “Hell naw, absolutely not!” But Emiaj believes they can.
So welcome to “Battle of the Sexes”! This is where men and woman can square off against each other on various topics that affect our community. I think this is the perfect forum to hash out our differences opinion. Personally I don’t think the ladies have a leg to stand on in this one. LOL! We invite all of you to give your honest opinion. Stand your ground and don’t apologize for what you think. FIght fair, no low blows, and in the event some one gets knocked down, back away from the screen and got to the opposite corner and wait for instructions…
Hell naw, a man and a woman can’t ever be “just friends”. It just wasn’t designed to be that way. God created men and women to have sexual attraction to one another. After spending enough time together, somebody’s gonna catch some feelings or at least some sort of desire. It’s just the law of nature. Just because a dude approaches you and you decide to put him in the ” friend zone” don’t mean he wants to be there.
I have sat patiently in the friend zone, sometimes for years, just waiting for the chance to pounce on my prey. (Lickin my lips while I rub my palms together.) LOL! I’m laughin but I’m serious. A dude will wait, especially if he really digs the chick, and listen ladies, this ain’t necessarily a bad thing. Don’t they say the best lovers were friend first? Some of ya’ll might need to give your “friend” a lil shot of pussy instead of chasin some of them suckaz out there. And don’t get it twisted, it’s not always the man. Sometimes the woman will be lurking waiting patiently in the wings, givin dude all kinds of relationship advice, loanin him money and offering support after some chick done broke his heart, silently slappin herself high fives because that no good bitch is gone and she’s one step closer to baggin her man.Me and my first wife were friends for years.
And my current love! Awe man, our relationship as friends began over 20 years ago when I was 15 as best friends. We used to dress alike in high school and everything. We supported each other in failed relationships. Her best girlfriend broke my heart and she was right there. We talked about sex and everything else. I even remember when she spent the night with my sister and I laid in the bed debating on whether I should creep down the hallway and try to get some. ( But my Mama knew I was a manish lil fucker, so her and dad was up cock blockin all night.)
I’ll never the day I pounced. I was 18 and she was a junior in high school We were on the phone talkin as usual, our normal convo. She was tellin me how nobody had ever given her oral sex. I was like “WHAT”? You have to have done it to you, girls go crazy!” And honestly I felt as her friend, that it was my duty to see that she experienced it. I told her that I would come over “as her friend” and show her what it feels like. I went over there with no future intentions on my mind. I looked at it like a boy and a girl teaching each other how to kiss. I know ya’ll think I’m lying but I was going to eat her out and that was it. That was 17 years ago and I’ve been slurpin her up ever since. We’ve went our separate ways at times but because of our “friendship” we’ve always had some kind of relationship. If we decide to part ways we basically have to run away from each other, at one point she left town to try to escape “US”. So no, a man and a woman can never be “just friends”. The line might never get crossed but somebody is feelin somebody.
I think this is a good topic because I’ve heard so many women refer to some dude as their “friend”, and they relieve that shit. I’m sorry Sweetie, he’s tryin to fuck you. LOL! He’s just passive about it. He’s secretly earning “pussy points Comin over to fix your car, loanin you money, talkin to you about the asshole you’re with…who doesn’t appreciate you. He’s addin all that shit up in his head. The whole time you’re venting your frustrations he’s thinkin, “If I had her I wouldn’t do her like that.” Alot of ya’ll are some attractive women who have some shit goin for yourselves… and you think dude don’t notice? He has an advantage over you that no other man has. ESPECIALLY if you don’t look at him like that, because you tell him shit you wouldn’t tell a boyfriend or potential lover. You’re tellin him the real shit. Friends my ass!
I could go go on and on, but I’ll tell you what. We need a volunteer for an experiment, we would love to do a feature story on this shit. Since ya’ll “just friends” take your home boy out for some drinkin and partying. Not in no T shirt and sneakers either. Dress like you would for a date or a regular ladies night out. Get drunk. Take him back to your place. Tell him to spend the night because it’s not safe for him to drive home intoxicated. Friends don’t let friends drive drunk! And ya’ll are friends right? Then, I dare you…I double dog dare you to walk around the house naked. I bet he fucks the shit out of you. LOL! Let us know how it goes.
Peace and Love,
Richarh Aswanu is the founder of Urban Image Magazine.
He also writes under the pseudonym Daddy Rich. Where
he pens graphic street novels such as “Mack’s Revenge”,
“Shh…Beware of the Snitch Killer”, “By Any Means” and
“Kitty Licker”; an upcoming collection of erotic short stories.
You can find more writing by this author at www.gangstalit.com
Tagged as Friends, friendships, Just friends, men and women in relationships and friendships, women and relationships
Categorized as Blog Topics, Dating & Relationships, Blog Topics, What Do You Think, Blog Topics, What You May Not Know
Two days ago I was watching Wendy Williams and a surprise guest came out. It was DMC from Run DMC. His purpose was to tell about this organization he is apart of and since you’re not going to hear about it in any of the popular blogs, websites, or news shows because it deals with positivity and black men I made it my duty to let you know.
Garden of Dreams Foundation was created in 2006. Their goal is to provide services to children and their family who are in difficult situations whether that is due to poverty, foster care, homelessness or an illness.
Every year the foundation hosts a talent show allowing almost 100 kids to showcase their talent at Radio City Music Hall. It is open to the public free of charge. This year’s event just passed it was March 17th; however, there are other programs they offer. I’ll give you info on how to help or donate at the end of the post.
MSG Classroom Program. All within 8 weeks students are taught the basics of working on establishing a career in the television industry.
Fuse Rocks the Classroom. This introduces high school students to the music industry.
Make A Dream Come True makes dreams come true for sick children.
Alright, do you feel inspired to help either financially or thru volunteering your services? Contact Garden of Dreams at 212-465-4170 or email them at email@example.com as far as donating money thru your credit card visit http://donate.gardenofdreamsfoundation.org/ or send your check to:
- Garden of Dreams Foundation
- 2 Penn Plaza 14th floor
- New York, NY 10121
Lets get this foundation out there so more of us can contribute to this positive work. Even if all you can do is tell about it on your Facebook page or Twitter that is fine; you never know who your friends know. Lets make positive stories like this seen on all of the major social media websites, we’ve clearly seen what these sites can do if utilized properly.
Peace and luv!
- DMC is the Creative Director of the 2012 Garden of Dreams Talent Show (getwititmagazine.com)
- Rap Legend DMC To Serve As Creative Director Of Garden Of Dreams Talent Show (allhiphop.com)
Tagged as black man, blogs, financially, foster care, Friends, Fuse Rocks the Classroom, Garden of Dreams Foundation, homelessness, illness, Make A Dream Come True, MSG Classroom Program, negative, organization, positive, poverty, Radio City Music Hall, Run DMC, social medias, talent show, talents, websites, Wendy Williams
Categorized as Blog Topics, Empowerment Issues & Politics, Blog Topics, Fashion & The Arts, Blog Topics, Gossip & Entertainment News, Blog Topics, What You May Not Know